Jef The Cyclist - With Ion Air Pro Plus

I believe there is a colony of Jefs somewhere in my suburb. The warm weather brings them out and they swarm along the road in the morning as I start for work. You see clouds of them as you approach the traffic lights - it can be quite spectacular as they flash past you in their multicoloured outfits, lycra-clad quoits bobbing away as far as the eye can see. Horrible sight to start the day with.

Leaving this philosophical observation aside, I noticed a variant on one of the Jefs this morning. On top of the Alien Mother helmet was one of the small video recorder cameras - I don't think it was one of the Air Pro or Go Pro, but it was something of that nature. I wondered if he had one of those hands-free mobile phones plugged into his ear as well - he seemed to be talking to thin air as he rolled past. Perhaps he was just speaking to The Voices...

I hope the next time The Voices contact him the tell him that the camera mounted on the top of the helmet looks pretty silly. If it is designed to record his feats of daring-do on the race track, he is a day late. If it is to record the outrages and assaults he will receive on the road, it is pointed in the wrong direction - more people will run into his wazoo than his bazoo. In any case it is just too obvious. If he wishes to operate Sneaky-cam he needs to put it on his bike handlebars or on the side of his helmet where it is camoflaged by the outline of his head.

If it is to record the tail-gunner's view of approaching BMW's the scope for mounting widens. It would also be a more formidable menace pointed backwards, as it would record all the drivers texting and doing their hair as they approach the lights. I am not guilty of this sort of thing - I have not figured out how to text on my Nokia and at my age the little hair I do have hardly matters. Still, the thought of being recorded by the video camera as I bear down on the Jef with the 14th century jousting lance couched in my armour would make me think twice about it.

Or at least do my hair.

Note: On a sales subject. I see the Ion Air Pro Plus has several bike mounts that allow handlebars, top of helmet, and side of helmet mounting straight out of the box. The wazoo mount you have to get from Queensland and it comes in a plain, sealed package...

Your Ticket To Fame - With Air Pro

Actually that is three tickets. One is for 15 seconds of fame and one is for 3 hours in the E.R. and one is for another 2 weeks in the Orthopaedic ward.

You see these are those sort of cameras. You saw the '60 Minutes' report on on of their competitors - the Go Pro camera - and you rushed up in regiments to purchase it - so much so that it sold out. It was a media coup for one company but really the television company should have mentioned that there are a number of other makers of the same sort of thing; the camera that can be clipped onto a moving object to record the moment when it meets a stationary object. In glorious HD video, colour, sound, and bad language.

The ion Air Pro - in this case the Air Pro Plus kit comes with any number of temptations to disaster. Helmet mount kit - bike mount kit adhesive mounts, etc. There are kits designed to be fastened to surfboards, kayaks, and manned torpedos. Should you wish to attack the TIRPITZ in Lofoten Fjiord you can do so and replay it at home in the lounge. You can fasten the thing to the wall of the reception centre at a wedding and capture the reception punch by punch. Your only limit is your imagination, and several Commonwealth laws.

Pardon the laziness of a pack shot to give you some of he details of the kit - and please be aware that further models of this camera system can be had that are already fitted with the Wifi mechanism - we watched our trade representative use it here in the shop yesterday to send signals directly to his iPad. I believe there are also arrangements to send the signals to something called and Android, and presumably also to the old Pong machine in the pub.

It is a sturdy camera, and seems a little more organised than its rival. he housing is in itself well waterproof and the operational buttons for single still shot or starting the video are up on top in an intuitive position. I cannot say if the streamlined shape of the housing is better for an active user but it looks as if it would take less skin off the operator during the crash.

There was also another thing that we noted for the users of the Wifi-equipped model; they could send an initial signal to their iPad to see what the camera was seeing before they tightened the bike or helmet mount - thus getting the view they wanted before setting off.

The shape of the housing also suggests the front of a Sidewinder missile, leading to the natural* desire to put it on the front of something with an Estes engine. Or not. * My nature, not yours...

In store right now and you can watch the video of the cameras in action as well.