Uncle Dick's Workshop - Friday 4

Every Friday at 10:00AM - we will be bringing you the sort of cutting-edge expertise that leaves ragged bits and sore fingers - Uncle Dick's Workshop. The advice is free - free from good sense in most instances....It really cranks up around the first of April.

Q:      Do you do weddings?

A:      No-one does weddings – the verb is “survive”.

Q:      Why are most professional cameras black? Is it to avoid attracting attention?

A:      Not at all – if professionals wished to avoid attracting attention they would dress better and stop holding award seminars. The manufacturers use black plastic because it is cheaper than coloured plastic. If orange peel was cheaper than plastic you would have a DSLR with a citrus smell.

Q:      Is photography art?

A:      No. Art is exhibiting porcelain urinals in major galleries and charging people $25 to look at them. In some cases they stand in line to look at them. You can do that in the loo for less.

Q:      Why is memory so cheap now?

A:      I forget.

Q:      Will a grey card give my images better colour?

A:      Yes. Put it in front of the lens until all you can see is grey. Your viewers will thank you.